The History of Me & You

A profile with no picture

I send out a 'like' (or whatever it is on match.com)

She replies

We meet the next Sunday

I wake too late and shower quick

I can't park. I call her

She's waiting outside the Tavern. She's nice. But sad

We talk. And we talk and we watch a film. The Lady in the Water

I walk her to her car and we kiss on the cheek

We meet on the Wednesday and have a Mexican meal

“Would you like to come in,” she asks

“No, that's okay, don't want to disturb.”

“The house is empty.”

We enter. We hug. I leave feeling good

The next night on the phone. Come over. The girls are in bed

We hug. We kiss. A little bit more. I please her

We meet on Saturday. We have sex. I find out her name from the mail. Sarah.

We talk. And we talk. We have sex. And we talk

And we have sex. I love to hear her voice. To please her

A call at 2am. Friends are arguing.

At 3am. They are arguing still. "Can you get me?" I don't like this

I take her home. She takes off her shoes in the car. Walks in the house. Gets in bed with dirty feet

Why did I love this about her... but I want to break up. I want someone new

And then it happens – I talk to myself. "Give her a chance!" Give myself a chance

We go on. I please her. And I please her more. She changes. She's happy

Candles everywhere. "I didn't know this happened to people." she said

It makes me happy to see this. The oil. The skin. And more

And more

You're Bree, she said. I like this. A spilled drink and sex as playful punishment

We lie together on the sofa and I can't keep it in. "I think I'm falling in love with you."

This is heaven. It's no longer sex, this is what 'making love' means

2½ hours and her voice 25 times. I'm in heaven

So much heaven...

And then it isn't. Then it's over. And then I have her back!

Champagne and a dance just for me

A letter through the post - she's a free woman. 11:23 my grandfather's ring

Then an awkward night

And a text the next day from the airport and my life falls apart

"I'll never forget you." she said

The anger comes, but nowhere to vent but my phone

I accept it. It's over. That's okay. Then the pain

I beg

Finally I'm numb on Year's Eve. By myself. In the centre of town. Alone. I want it to end.

A few scattered calls and an insinuation of manipulation

"There was always one thing I didn't like about you." But she never told me. Goodbye

Four years later, my life is over. I reach out to her. I hope. But she doesn't want me

Now, an unseen message from 7 months ago. I'm in shock. I'm upset. I'm encouraged, I think

I tell her I love her and she's beautiful

We type. We chat. We text.

The whirlpool grabs me. I want to swim a while... but I tire quickly